Friday, October 24, 2008

Beating a dead horse

I just can't leave it alone. I always tell myself I won't bring it up anymore. I won't bore people with my obsession. I won't ask "How do your kids sleep?" after the first handshake when I meet someone new. But I can't help myself.

Do any of you know that old folk tale where the hero has a naked old man with a long white beard riding his shoulders and he can't get him off? The old man drives him on and on mercilessly. He has no control over his own life and is driven to exhaustion. Leah, Tara? What's that story called? Anyway, sometimes I feel like I have two not-so-old men on my shoulders cracking the whip.

I've kept this blog positive and complaint free so far and I want to keep it that way. But I also want to document a bit of what life is like right now so that later I can look back on this and thank GOD that things (and by things I mostly mean sleep) will (hopefully) have drastically improved. I also plan to dust this information off when the boys are both teenagers and have hormones raging like every other boy. I'll use this post to scare them straight. Teenagers should simply NEVER EVER have kids. Teenagers should be required to shadow a mom of an infant for a month, 24-7, as a part of their sex education. And not just watch her but mimic her every move day and night. Seriously. Anyone with me?

Last night, Fintan fell asleep at around 8:30 which is pretty good for him. Coen was up and down and up and down and up and down (the downs lasted approximately 5 minutes each and the ups about a half hour) until 10:30. He then woke up to nurse several times throughout the night (2 times? 3?) and then Fintan was up before six and Coen by 6:30. Ouch. But that's fairly normal. Their naps are usually very short or don't happen at all and very rarely overlap. My life is not my own by any stretch. Have I scared you straight, yet, teenagers of the future? Have I mentioned shadowing a new mom 24-7? I may just set that up for you, teenagers of the future, if you give me any reason! Do you hear me up there? Have I mentioned how little sleep you will get if you have babies? Have I mentioned the sleep thing yet?!

Honestly, if sleep were something that people left lying carelessly around in locked cars or kept in gleaming piles in bank vaults I would acquire a jimmy and a ski mask and go on a crime spree.

Now please excuse me, teenagers of the future, while I go tend to the two not-so-old men on my shoulders.


Christine said...

Hell, woman. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture. And they wonder why moms of little ones are cranky. We're being tortured, you dolts! Hope you get some sleep soon.

Alina said...

Ah, thanks, Chris. :) I remember when I was a young teenager my older sister had to go a whole night without sleep for some tests that were being run. My dad rented loads of movies and boy was I jealous! I dreamed and wished that one day I too would get to stay up all night long. Why do I always get the stupid wishes granted? ;)

SaRaH said...

Seriously. You cannot function without sleep. It robs you of courtesy, patience, dreams, creativity, and sanity. Give yourself MAJOR credit for getting everyone fed each day. I'm impressed. I barely get that done with sleep.

Alina said...

That's funny you say that, Sarah, because I don't know how many times I've told Pat that all I've managed to do in a day is keep the boys fed. :)

Jacque said...

Alina, I don't have good sleepers either. There are many nights where all three end up in bed with me. They all start out in their own beds, but they always find me. Chloe (10) makes most nights in her bed all night, but not always. Owen (5) is beside me every night at some point. Phoebe always is too. I've given up the fight. I don't have any fight left in me. I don't focus on it like I used to. I realize that some day they won't want me anymore and I try to enjoy the closeness. Although there are nights where I want to scream "Get out of my bed!". I am never, ever alone. Day or night. It makes a body weary. Last month a neighbor and her 6 year old daughter were killed in a car accident. (The 4 yr. old son survived.) It has really weighed on me. Now at night when I'm crowded in the bed, I think how that father would give anything to be cuddled in bed with his daughter. Depressing, I know, but sometimes you have to look at the bright side. I guess I'm saying, try to focus on the positive and know sleep isn't everything. Hang in there!

brooke said...

Oh Alina!! I just love your way with words. Those boys of yours...they are just too darn cute and smart to sleep, I guess. :) They just love their mama too much! You are such a great mom!

I totally agree with teenagers being required to shadow a new mother--it should be a regular class in high school. Actually, they could just attend one of my births and that would scare them into celibacy for life. There was a (med) student present at Tommy's birth and she said that was all the birth control she would ever need.